Self-Care Sunday Interview with Keli Denise

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Introduce yourself – tell us a little bit about yourself:

I am Keli Denise, from St. Louis, MO.

Superpower is writing. My superhero is love.

My mission is to be an expression of Love, always and my purpose is to help transform minds, all in the name of love.

I want people to get out of the boxes they’ve made, and then, see there were no boxes, to begin with.

 

How do you define self-care and what does it mean to you?:

Self-care for me is love.

When I am in the vibration of love, I am taking care of myself. Whatever that looks like.

There is no question of, “Do I love myself?” I am love, my self.

What self-care means to me is peace. When I am being myself, I am in peace.

I can be in peace with chaos all around me.

However, if I am not being myself, that’s when chaos stirs within me and I have no peace.

 

Writing is self-care for me. It’s therapy.

 

Why is self-care important, particularly for women?:

Self-care is important, particularly for women and women of color to be exact, because we are so used to doing and being for everyone else.

I am not a mother, YET, however, I know how important it is to have at least 5 minutes of free time just to breathe or even say thank you.

I also know that the majority of mothers I know, don’t do it and feel guilty if they do.

We give ourselves away because we don’t know how to give it to ourselves.

We weren’t taught that.

Society isn’t built like that.

And for those who were brought up with the importance of loving the self and taking care of the self, my goodies, what a blessing you received.

 

How do you practice self-care in your daily life?:

I would say my daily routine or a ritual is to be in nature.

I go to a local lake here in St. Louis almost every day and I can sit for hours.

Sundays are the day when I go to brunch and then the water and sit and write.

Writing is self-care for me. It’s therapy. It’s how Spirit expresses Herself through me. It’s my piece of peace.

Self-care to me is also laughter. I loooove to laugh and I laugh a lot. I’m like a “big” little girl. LOL

I strive to do whatever feels good to me. As long as it is good for my mind, body and spirit, I’ll do it.

 

Hmmm, my biggest challenge – I would have to say, staying out of my mind.

 

What part of your self-care routine is most important to you? And is there one that is vital to you even when you’re having the worst day?:

Great question.

The most important self-care “routine” would be my alone time.

I’m one who naturally likes to be alone (I was an only child for 7 1/2 years).

I absolutely love connecting with like-minded people, don’t get me wrong, however, there is nothing like listening to my jazz, burning my incense, sitting on the patio, looking at the sky and giving thanks.

I’m a thinker.

I’m always in my mind so quiet time is also the time where I can get out of my mind and be intentional with my thoughts.

My quiet time would also be that one that is vital for me when I’m having the “worst” day. I unwind and get centered that way.

 

What is your biggest challenge when it comes to self-care?:

Hmmm, my biggest challenge – I would have to say, staying out of my mind.

My mind can get me so out of alignment that it interferes with caring for myself.

I will self-sabotage myself just by thought alone.

So, being the observer of my thoughts helps, HOWEVER, I can let that train of thought go and go and go until I’m exhausted.

 

We cannot give on an empty tank.

 

What do you think are some of the most common misconceptions about self-care?:

I think some of the most common misconceptions about self-care are it’s all about the outside.

It’s simply getting our hair and nails done. It’s about making sure we look good.

I say, “If you feel good, you look good.” Not the other way around.

Yes, those are nice things. I love for my nails and toenails to be perfect and my hair to be just right, however, for me again, self-care is about love and peace.

If I’m not in the vibration of either of those, what I do to my hands, feet and hair won’t matter.

 

What tips, resources or advice can you share for anyone struggling with self-care?:

I would say for anyone struggling with self-care, ask yourself why? Why am I struggling?

Ask yourself: what do I believe about myself?

Most women don’t believe they are worthy of care let alone self-care.

Again, most don’t even know that it is a must that we take care of ourselves.

We cannot give on an empty tank.

I know the, “take time to be still and listen within or meditate” is so cliche, however, it’s imperative that we take at least 5 – 10 minutes throughout the day to connect with our breath and give thanks.

If there is nothing else that can be done or if simply being in the moment is difficult, say thank you to your higher power.

Gratitude shifts a low vibration to a higher vibration.

Oh and remember to love, always.

 

You are the most powerful person in your life.

 

What are your favourite self-care mantras, quotes, poems, songs, books or movies?:

My favorite quote is: “I am deliberate and afraid of nothing” by Audre Lorde.

My favorite song is, “Golden” by Jill Scott.

My favorite movie is, “Love Jones”.

Another favorite quote is:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

– Marianne Williamson from the book “A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of “A Course in Miracles”

 

What is the most important advice would you give to your younger self?:

The most important thing I would say to my younger self is, “YOU ARE WORTHY”, do not believe anything anyone tells you.

Even if it’s “I love you” – because tomorrow they may say, “I hate you.” And you will be depending on that.

You are not here to be liked or to be loved, you are here to love and be yourself at all times.

No one outside of you can nor will they determine your worth.

You are the most powerful person in your life. The Most High Creator, chose you to live through.

 

What is your hope for your future and the future of women?:

My hope for my future is that I continue to be an expression of love.

To continue to be a vessel for the Divine.

She chose writing so as long as I’m given the material to write, I will continue to write.

My hope for the future of women is that they truly know they are loved and that love is their birthright.

That they know how to love themselves and when that happens, everything else falls into place.

That no one can make or break you.

No one can make you happy or sad.

It’s only our perceptions and thoughts that make us believe that.

 

Connect with Keli

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Instagram: @LoveAlwaysKeli

 

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